One day, back when I had a toddler and a baby, I posted on this blog. Not very regularly, but occasionally. Now, I have a big boy, and a toddler who is well on her way to being a big girl. I'm not really sure how that happened, how I let nearly two years go by since updating this place.
I have excuses, as does everyone for why I don't do it. But my biggest reason is I'm lazy.
Today (well, yesterday) was my 34th birthday. And as far as birthdays go, it was pretty good. The kids were very excited. I went out to a fun lunch with my coworker and had some margaritas. Another coworker brought in birthday treats. I had my horrible (HORRIBLE!) electronics class today, I brought in cookies to share with the class. Then it was over and the family took me out for dinner.
I had a great day, really I did. There was just one little part of my day that sucked, and it's been in the back of my mind the rest of the day, weighing down my heart.
While I was reading through the birthday messages on my wall I came across a post from a friend of mine. Her sister was killed Wednesday in a near head on collision. I didn't know her sister, but my heart is breaking for my friends who have to say goodbye to their baby sister. She was 26 years old.
I can't imagine losing my brother. I don't know what to say to them. I have never been where they are right now, and God willing I never will be. But it certainly makes you reassess things in your life.
I want to enjoy my life more. I want to be remembered as someone who laughed a lot. Not someone who is stressed out and crabby. I need to figure out how to get to that point. I want to be able to enjoy the time I spend with my family.
I find writing is a great way to help me feel more balanced. I am thinking about applying for the Creative Memories Design Team.
This is an incredibly rambly post. Sorry. My brain is all over the place right now.
I'm going to try to post more often, perhaps if I am doing it more often, I can be more concise. Maybe not. I'm not going to promise anything exciting. Just words.
Hug your family.